7 Ways to Make Time for Your Partner & Strengthen Your Relationship

If your best friends blew into town, you’d make time for him or her, right? How about a cousin or other family member? And if you have children you always make time for them, right?

What about your spouse or significant other? Do you make time for them?

It’s important that you do. When the kids are grown and friends move away, who is left? Your partner. It’s a relationship that you need to nurture for the duration. Just being married or saying you’re in a committed relationship isn’t enough. Being “together” is hard work.

If you think you’d make time for friends or other relatives then you need to do the same for that special someone in your life.

  1. Make time to talk and catch up. Share what’s going on at work, with the kids, with your extended families. And don’t forget to really TALK. Not just about the day-to-day stuff. Talk about your hopes and dreams and your thoughts on the future. The deep stuff is the good stuff!
  2. Cook meals together. Helping each other in the kitchen is a good time to bond and it gives you the chance to try new foods that you both might like. Perhaps take turns choosing what the main course or sides might be.
  3. Do the household chores together. No one wants to be the household grunt. Cut the workload in half to get things done quicker, then you’ll have more time for fun.
  4. Take a drive. Relax, roll down the windows, put on your favorite music, cruise for a bit and spend some time talking and holding hands. Remember when you were younger and went on dates? Getting there and back was part of the journey.
  5. Text. Send each texts during the day, and not just about the daily mundane stuff like bills and who is driving carpool. Flirt! We do Sexy Text Tuesday memes for you to screenshot and text. Use ‘em! Here’s one. And another.
  6. If you have children, do the kid routine together. Homework, carpool, bath time, bedtime. Get it all done together (more quickly!) then you’ll have more you time. Also, when you both spend time with the kiddos, it gives you something more to talk about. You can’t really discuss the funny things your kids do and say if you both weren’t there to see it.
  7. Make time for sex. Don’t just flop into bed each night, exhausted. Plan for it if you have to! Start by flirting via text, make dinner and do chores together so that no one partner is “too tired” for sex. {TIP: One partner will grow resentful if they are doing all the work and then you can kiss the sex goodbye!}

Taking time for each other will make your relationship stronger!

Any advice that you would add to the list?

XOXO

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Our Revolutionary Soldiers Were Badass

I did some sightseeing today. Specifically, I was at a Revolutionary War Museum. I was struck with how badass our early founders were. The soldiers who fought in the Revolutionary War were volunteers, and they fought for seven years. No pay. No guarantee of food or water. No promise of a better life. No warm clothes in winter. No warm place to sleep. But they did it. They had beliefs and they had a drive to be free. I often wonder if our country could pull it off today. Would volunteers fight for our country again?

I wonder, but I hope we never have to find out.

Peace! And freedom!

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Stand for What is Right

 

I have this poster hanging in my office and it’s a motto that I genuinely try to live by. There are a number of times when I’ve had to be the obnoxious loudmouth who spoke up and stuck my nose in — my children’s schools, county meetings, out in public, school board, with other parents or friends. When things aren’t RIGHT, they just aren’t right.

So I have a really hard time understanding why NO ONE stood up on that United Airlines plane to defend the man who was forcibly being removed from flight 3411? WHY? Was getting a viral video more important? Was Tweeting the right thing to do? Have hashtags and @ mentions replaced human decency?

I honestly can’t decide which is more distasteful to me: the treatment of that individual passenger, or the remaining passengers who did nothing but rolled video instead.

I’m reminded of a John Mellencamp song lyric, “You’ve got to stand for something, or you’re gonna fall for anything.” And I believe that. There are too many people standing on the sidelines not wanting to get involved. Which reminds me of another saying,”If not you, then who?” and Another, “If you see something, say something.”

Have we, as a society, gone completely overboard with citizen journalism at all costs? I certainly hope not, because there are many great tragedies which stem from people not doing anything to help others. I know the Holocaust is an extreme example but the words in this poem, about the cowardice of German intellectuals who allowed the purging of different races, ring true in times like these:

First they came …
By German pastor Martin Niemöller (1892–1984).

First they came for the Socialists, and I did not speak out—
Because I was not a Socialist.

Then they came for the Trade Unionists, and I did not speak out—
Because I was not a Trade Unionist.

Then they came for the Jews, and I did not speak out—
Because I was not a Jew.

Then they came for me—and there was no one left to speak for me.

Peace!

P.S. If you’re not sure what I’m referring to, here’s a link to the incident and Tweets from bystanders.

 

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My Snoggler

I’m outing Jenny. She’s what I call a “snoggler.” If you’re married or live with someone, you might already know what it means to snoggle.

Snoggle (verb) – to hog the bed under the guise of snuggling.

Snoggler (noun) – one who snoggles.

Jenny likes to sleep on her left side but scoots her shapely ass as far as she can toward the center of the bed, most often encroaching on my half of the bed. Or, she’ll drape her arms and legs over me on me while resting her head on my pillow. She says she’s cuddling but I’m on to her. She’s staking out additional real estate. Thank God I love her. And really who couldn’t use a good snoggle from time to time?!

Is there a snoggler in your bed? Tell us about it.

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A Friend’s Frightening Loss and Reflection

There’s something that’s really been messing with my head. I recently reconnected with Susan on Facebook; she was someone I grew up with but hadn’t seen since graduation. Back in those days we didn’t have cell phones or social media. Letters and expensive long-distance phone calls were it and it was easy to lose touch with people. But now, the 21st century…what a time to be alive!

Anyway, last week Susan posted some photos and a love letter mentioning how had it had be two months since her husband John — her soulmate and high school sweetheart — had passed away. Cancer. Seems that it’s always cancer, doesn’t it? Sigh.

John, Susan and I all graduated high school together; we’re the same age. Fifty. What’s given me pause is that I’ve reached the age where friends and spouses are going to start passing away, and that scares the bejesus out of me. Death is natural, and I know friends will die, but losing MY spouse is what scares me most. Losing MY soulmate. The thought alone is almost more than I can bear. The grief and loneliness would be excruciating. But also, half my memories would die.

Jack and I have more than 32 years under our belts at this point, and we  joke that he holds half the memories and I hold the other half. When we reminisce about life events, we each remember different parts thus bringing the recollection to a whole. We truly are one another’s “other half.” What if my other half was no longer with me? What would happen to half our experiences? Half my memories? Half my life? Losing Jack is one of the most frightening things that could happen.

It’s too much to consider.

So instead, I’ve decided I need to remind myself daily that it truly is important to live every moment to its fullest. We all say it. We all see the motivational memes. But it’s true. Life is precious. Eventually one spouse will outlive the other and when the time comes, there should be no regrets. I don’t want Jack or myself to think we should have loved harder, lived better or laughed more. If you’re still reading, I ask that you please do the same. Love your family like it’s your job and demand the same of those close to YOU. Because, you just never know…

Peace!

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Seven Day Sex Challenge – Day 7

Hello friends, today is the last day of Jack+Jenny’s Seven Day Sex Challenge.
This is designed to be a fun challenge to do with your partner. There are no hard and fast rules, just two suggestions:

  1. Talk together about how you’d like to tackle the challenge du jour. Do what’s comfortable. You can scale back if you’re feeling timid, or amp up the daily challenge to meet your own needs. But be a little open minded and perhaps push your boundaries.
  2. Have fun!

Seven Day Sex Challenge – Day 7: The Full Menu

This week we’ve challenged you to up your foreplay game, try sex in different places, get loud, look around for sex props, experience role playing, and try some light bondage. Today, we want you to put it all together into one amazing evening of sexual excitement!

Perhaps start the evening with a nice dinner and drinks. Or order in and get cozy with your sweetheart. Refer back to our post on foreplay to get you both in the mood. Send you love a sexy text, or two. Have sex in a new place while getting loud! Incorporate your props while trying some more role playing. Take turns tying each other up until neither of you can stand it any longer. Then ravish each other with all your sexual might! Don’t forget to make it fun and sexy, and it’s OK to be silly as well. Laughter is the best medicine and a great aphrodisiac, too.

We hope the full menu provides you and your partner with an amazing night of sex, and puts you on the path to a well-fulfilled sex life as well. The links to Sex Challenge Days 1-6 are below for your reference.

READY, SET…GO!

XOXO

Day 1 – Rock the Foreplay

Day 2 – Get out of the Bedroom

Day 3 – Get Loud

Day 4 – Find Some Props

Day 5 – Let’s Pretend

Day 6 – Tie ’em Up

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Seven Day Sex Challenge – Day 6

Hello friends, today is the sixth day of Jack+Jenny’s Seven Day Sex Challenge.
This is designed to be a fun challenge to do with your partner. There are no hard and fast rules, just two suggestions:

  1. Talk together about how you’d like to tackle the challenge du jour. Do what’s comfortable. You can scale back if you’re feeling timid, or amp up the daily challenge to meet your own needs. But be a little open minded and perhaps push your boundaries.
  2. Have fun!

Seven Day Sex Challenge – Day 6: Tie ’em Up

We see you starting to get squeamish, but don’t fear, this can be fun. We’re not asking you to use handcuffs (unless that’s your thing!) because we, too, read “Gerald’s Game” by Stephen King. Brrrrrr. Instead, use scarves or neckties! They’re softer anyway.

If you have a four-poster bed or a bed with headboards and/or footboards you can easily tie up your partner’s hand or feet. If not, you might need to tuck the scarves under the mattress or under the bedframe to make the tethering snug. If that’s not possible either, tie just your partner hands, position the hands above the head, and the on-top partner simple holds the tether.

While you have your partner tied, tickle, tease, nibble, lick, suck, kiss…whatever drives them wild! It’s incredibly sexy to have that much attention paid to you while not being able to move. Maybe bring back the props from the other day as an added surprise.

Decide on a safe word if things get too intense or frightening.

READY, SET…GO!

XOXO

Day 1 – Rock the Foreplay

Day 2 – Get out of the Bedroom

Day 3 – Get Loud

Day 4 – Find Some Props

Day 5 – Let’s Pretend

Day 7 – The Full Menu

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