A Friend’s Frightening Loss and Reflection

There’s something that’s really been messing with my head. I recently reconnected with Susan on Facebook; she was someone I grew up with but hadn’t seen since graduation. Back in those days we didn’t have cell phones or social media. Letters and expensive long-distance phone calls were it and it was easy to lose touch with people. But now, the 21st century…what a time to be alive!

Anyway, last week Susan posted some photos and a love letter mentioning how had it had be two months since her husband John — her soulmate and high school sweetheart — had passed away. Cancer. Seems that it’s always cancer, doesn’t it? Sigh.

John, Susan and I all graduated high school together; we’re the same age. Fifty. What’s given me pause is that I’ve reached the age where friends and spouses are going to start passing away, and that scares the bejesus out of me. Death is natural, and I know friends will die, but losing MY spouse is what scares me most. Losing MY soulmate. The thought alone is almost more than I can bear. The grief and loneliness would be excruciating. But also, half my memories would die.

Jack and I have more than 32 years under our belts at this point, and we  joke that he holds half the memories and I hold the other half. When we reminisce about life events, we each remember different parts thus bringing the recollection to a whole. We truly are one another’s “other half.” What if my other half was no longer with me? What would happen to half our experiences? Half my memories? Half my life? Losing Jack is one of the most frightening things that could happen.

It’s too much to consider.

So instead, I’ve decided I need to remind myself daily that it truly is important to live every moment to its fullest. We all say it. We all see the motivational memes. But it’s true. Life is precious. Eventually one spouse will outlive the other and when the time comes, there should be no regrets. I don’t want Jack or myself to think we should have loved harder, lived better or laughed more. If you’re still reading, I ask that you please do the same. Love your family like it’s your job and demand the same of those close to YOU. Because, you just never know…

Peace!

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Seven Day Sex Challenge – Day 7

Hello friends, today is the last day of Jack+Jenny’s Seven Day Sex Challenge.
This is designed to be a fun challenge to do with your partner. There are no hard and fast rules, just two suggestions:

  1. Talk together about how you’d like to tackle the challenge du jour. Do what’s comfortable. You can scale back if you’re feeling timid, or amp up the daily challenge to meet your own needs. But be a little open minded and perhaps push your boundaries.
  2. Have fun!

Seven Day Sex Challenge – Day 7: The Full Menu

This week we’ve challenged you to up your foreplay game, try sex in different places, get loud, look around for sex props, experience role playing, and try some light bondage. Today, we want you to put it all together into one amazing evening of sexual excitement!

Perhaps start the evening with a nice dinner and drinks. Or order in and get cozy with your sweetheart. Refer back to our post on foreplay to get you both in the mood. Send you love a sexy text, or two. Have sex in a new place while getting loud! Incorporate your props while trying some more role playing. Take turns tying each other up until neither of you can stand it any longer. Then ravish each other with all your sexual might! Don’t forget to make it fun and sexy, and it’s OK to be silly as well. Laughter is the best medicine and a great aphrodisiac, too.

We hope the full menu provides you and your partner with an amazing night of sex, and puts you on the path to a well-fulfilled sex life as well. The links to Sex Challenge Days 1-6 are below for your reference.

READY, SET…GO!

XOXO

Day 1 – Rock the Foreplay

Day 2 – Get out of the Bedroom

Day 3 – Get Loud

Day 4 – Find Some Props

Day 5 – Let’s Pretend

Day 6 – Tie ’em Up

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Seven Day Sex Challenge – Day 6

Hello friends, today is the sixth day of Jack+Jenny’s Seven Day Sex Challenge.
This is designed to be a fun challenge to do with your partner. There are no hard and fast rules, just two suggestions:

  1. Talk together about how you’d like to tackle the challenge du jour. Do what’s comfortable. You can scale back if you’re feeling timid, or amp up the daily challenge to meet your own needs. But be a little open minded and perhaps push your boundaries.
  2. Have fun!

Seven Day Sex Challenge – Day 6: Tie ’em Up

We see you starting to get squeamish, but don’t fear, this can be fun. We’re not asking you to use handcuffs (unless that’s your thing!) because we, too, read “Gerald’s Game” by Stephen King. Brrrrrr. Instead, use scarves or neckties! They’re softer anyway.

If you have a four-poster bed or a bed with headboards and/or footboards you can easily tie up your partner’s hand or feet. If not, you might need to tuck the scarves under the mattress or under the bedframe to make the tethering snug. If that’s not possible either, tie just your partner hands, position the hands above the head, and the on-top partner simple holds the tether.

While you have your partner tied, tickle, tease, nibble, lick, suck, kiss…whatever drives them wild! It’s incredibly sexy to have that much attention paid to you while not being able to move. Maybe bring back the props from the other day as an added surprise.

Decide on a safe word if things get too intense or frightening.

READY, SET…GO!

XOXO

Day 1 – Rock the Foreplay

Day 2 – Get out of the Bedroom

Day 3 – Get Loud

Day 4 – Find Some Props

Day 5 – Let’s Pretend

Day 7 – The Full Menu

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Seven Day Sex Challenge – Day 5

Hello friends, today is the fifth day of Jack+Jenny’s Seven Day Sex Challenge.
This is designed to be a fun challenge to do with your partner. There are no hard and fast rules, just two suggestions:

  1. Talk together about how you’d like to tackle the challenge du jour. Do what’s comfortable. You can scale back if you’re feeling timid, or amp up the daily challenge to meet your own needs. But be a little open minded and perhaps push your boundaries.
  2. Have fun!

Seven Day Sex Challenge – Day 5: Let’s pretend

Got any fantasies you’ve been aching to try? Give it a go for our role playing challenge!

Doctor and patient, cowboy and damsel in distress, cop and criminal, strangers in a bar, lonely party attendees, exchange students traveling in Europe, campers trapped in a tent during a storm, naughty employee who needs to be punished…whatever floats your boat…GO FOR IT! Dress the part, pull out a foreign accent, and use props to make it sizzle.

Look around your place and see what you’ve got that can be used as something sexy or erotic or silly!

READY, SET…GO!

XOXO

Day 1 – Rock the Foreplay

Day 2 – Get out of the Bedroom

Day 3 – Get Loud

Day 4 – Find Some Props

Day 6 – Tie ‘em Up

Day 7 – The Full Menu

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Seven Day Sex Challenge – Day 4

Hello friends, today is the fourth day of Jack+Jenny’s Seven Day Sex Challenge.
This is designed to be a fun challenge to do with your partner. There are no hard and fast rules, just two suggestions:

  1. Talk together about how you’d like to tackle the challenge du jour. Do what’s comfortable. You can scale back if you’re feeling timid, or amp up the daily challenge to meet your own needs. But be a little open minded and perhaps push your boundaries.
  2. Have fun!

Seven Day Sex Challenge – Day 4: Find some props

For today’s challenge, you need some props! If you’re into bedroom toys, get ’em out and put ’em to use. Have you ever tried any of the his-n-hers lotions? Pick up some and try it out. The sensations can be amazing. Try the toys AND the lotions for extra sizzle! If you’ve never tried food items, now’s your chance. Whipped cream is cliché, but it can be a lot of fun. Got chocolate syrup or other ice cream drizzles? Grab them! How about smearing the chocolate syrup with a strawberry and feeding it to your love? Music can be a great prop, too. Find songs that feel romantic or ones that set your libido into overdrive! How about a feather? Tease your sweetie with the light tickle of a feather. Lingerie makes a sexy prop even if it does end up on the floor.

Look around your place and see what you’ve got that can be used as something sexy or erotic or silly. This challenge is all about having FUN!

READY, SET…GO!

XOXO

Day 1 – Rock the Foreplay

Day 2 – Get out of the Bedroom

Day 3 – Get Loud

Day 5 – Let’s Pretend

Day 6 – Tie ‘em Up

Day 7 – The Full Menu

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Seven Day Sex Challenge – Day 3

Hello friends, today is the third day of Jack+Jenny’s Seven Day Sex Challenge.
This is designed to be a fun challenge to do with your partner. There are no hard and fast rules, just two suggestions:

  1. Talk together about how you’d like to tackle the challenge du jour. Do what’s comfortable. You can scale back if you’re feeling timid, or amp up the daily challenge to meet your own needs. But be a little open minded and perhaps push your boundaries.
  2. Have fun!

Seven Day Sex Challenge – Day 3: Get Loud

Are you quiet in bed? Would you like to get a little noisy? Now’s the perfect time to try! Start off with a little, “Mmmmm” and an “Ohhhh.” Throw in a “Yes” and a “More” and a “Don’t Stop.” Let your partner know, “Right there feels sooo good.” Guide your partner to where you like to be touched and then let them know how it excites you. If it seems right, throw out some naughty words. Let him or her know how amazing they feel during sex! I don’t think you’ll be sorry.

READY, SET…GO!

XOXO

Day 1 – Rock the Foreplay

Day 2 – Get out of the Bedroom

Day 4 – Find Some Props

Day 5 – Let’s Pretend

Day 6 – Tie ‘em Up

Day 7 – The Full Menu

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Seven Day Sex Challenge – Day 2

Hello friends, today is the second day of Jack+Jenny’s Seven Day Sex Challenge.
This is designed to be a fun challenge to do with your partner. There are no hard and fast rules, just two suggestions:

  1. Talk together about how you’d like to tackle the challenge du jour. Do what’s comfortable. You can scale back if you’re feeling timid, or amp up the daily challenge to meet your own needs. But be a little open minded and perhaps push your boundaries.
  2. Have fun!

Seven Day Sex Challenge – Day 2: Get Out of the Bedroom

When you’ve been together awhile sex can get stagnant and lackluster. If you’re a in-the-bed kind of couple, it’s time to get out! For this challenge, try a different location: the living room couch, the basement, your car in the garage or driveway, on the back deck, in the bathroom in front of the mirror, on the kitchen counter, your grandmother’s settee, you name it! This may also require different positions, so that’s a bonus — bent over, sitting up, doggie — whatever works to get out of the sex position rut.

So grab a pillow, towel, or blanket and scout out a great place for today’s challenge.

READY, SET…GO!

XOXO

Day 1 – Rock the Foreplay

Day 3 – Get Loud

Day 4 – Find Some Props

Day 5 – Let’s Pretend

Day 6 – Tie ‘em Up

Day 7 – The Full Menu

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Seven Day Sex Challenge – Day 1

Hello friends, today is the first day of Jack+Jenny’s Seven Day Sex Challenge.
This is designed to be a fun challenge to do with your partner. There are no hard and fast rules, just two suggestions:

  1. Talk together about how you’d like to tackle the challenge du jour. Do what’s comfortable. You can scale back if you’re feeling timid, or amp up the daily challenge to meet your own needs. But be a little open minded and perhaps push your boundaries.
  2. Have fun!

Seven Day Sex Challenge – Day 1: Rock the Foreplay

Let’s start off slowly and gently by focusing on foreplay. Begin during the day by touching more. Kissing longer. Hugging often. Send your partner a sexy text. Make innuendos. Give back rubs. Think dirty thoughts and daydream about what you want. Put your hands all over each other like you did when you were first together, and be sure to graze the naughty parts. Get yourself and your partner in the mood.

In bed, use your hands more — grabbing, touching, stroking. Don’t forget to use your lips and tongue. Lots of kissing and licking! Feel each other’s’ hot breath on your skin. Fantasize as you go. Don’t be afraid to ask for more or guide your partner to meet your needs, and vice versa.

Focusing on foreplay should get you good and ready to have at it! Additionally, it increases your intimacy and the connection you both feel.

READY, SET…GO!

XOXO

Day 2 – Get Out of the Bedroom

Day 3 – Get Loud

Day 4 – Find Some Props

Day 5 – Let’s Pretend

Day 6 – Tie ‘em Up

Day 7 – The Full Menu

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Monkeys Never Learn

Some time ago Jack and I watched a rerun of “Everybody Loves Raymond” on cable TV. I don’t have the slightest idea what that episode was about, but the punchline we took away was, “Monkeys never learn.” It involved a story about a monkey who kept doing…something or other…over and over, resulting in Ray’s declaration that “Monkeys never learn.”

I’ve seen plenty of animal behavior shows where monkeys are learning a whole lot, but the story and punchline were amusing and stuck with Jack and me. We use that line occasionally while noting that some people never learn or change their behavior in certain situations – yet they wonder why the outcome never changes. Maybe it’s a teenager who keeps disobeying the household rule and wonders why she is always in trouble. Or perhaps it’s an employee who isn’t following protocol and wonders why he doesn’t get that promotion. It might even be couples who feel their relationship is stagnant while not doing anything to spice it up. Or maybe there’s a continual argument among partners that never gets resolved because the same tactics are being used to battle it out.

Monkeys never learn.

I’m not saying this to be mean. I know full well that monkeys can learn. I’m saying this to point out the fact that the same-old-same-old doesn’t work. Whether it’s within the family dynamic, a job, or a marriage, take a different approach to the situation.

Let’s look at your marriage. Go ahead, we don’t judge. Do you keep fighting about chores? Money? Issues with the children? Sleeping patterns? Working too much? Someone is less than attentive? Whatever the case, try a different approach the next time the issue comes up. Are you a screamer? Think of calm way to sit down and talk. Are you too calm? Maybe it’s time to ruffle some feathers with a big demand. Are your thoughts scattered and you feel you can’t communicate your needs? Write ‘em down and makes notes about each. Do you just clam up and cry? Stop! You’ve got to let it out. Maybe writing it down will help you as well.

Whatever the case, take a look inside and figure out a different way. Be honest with yourself. How can you alter the way to argument goes? I like to think of this as fight strategizing. (Fightigizing?!) Plan how you want to have an argument or a discussion before it happens. Maybe while things are going well, talk about how you should disagree in the future. Come up with a safe word to stop the fight perhaps. Maybe you should take turns speaking your mind for 5 minutes each rather than shouting over one another. Figure out a way to put your partner in your shoes, and vice versa.

What do you think? What works for you? What have you learned, my little monkey? 😉 Drop us a line if you need some help:  thatbloggers@gmail.com

Check in again because Jack and I want to discuss that little thing I mentioned a few paragraphs back…spicing things up!

Peace!

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